life is short. how many of us truly take advantage of the beautiful time we have to be alive. i know i don't wake up in the morning and think wow i'm sure glad i'm breathing today. i think that is probably the last thing on my mind. other things clutter my life. school, work, friends, i have hardly any time to truly be thankful for everything i have been given. i have been given a home with two parents that love me, i have been given talents, i have been given the most incredibly amazing boyfriend in the whole entire world, and i know that i have a loving heavenly father that cares deeply for my well being. i am so lucky. we all are so lucky. but each in different ways. and i seem to forget this sometimes when life gets hard. life is too short to live with regrets.

day of love.

i still love valentines day even though my michael is away. he sent me the most beautiful card and a diamond pendant. i am wearing it around my neck as we speak. he also wrote me the most beautiful poem in the most beautiful handwriting. i was smiling ear to ear as i read it. it is incredible the power that words can have. i actually felt his love for me as i read. and even though the sound of his voice and the feel of his warmth are slipping away from me i still know that even after everything we go through together, he still loves me. he even loves me enough to tell me to date. yes i know. my own boyfriend who is crazy about me wants me to date other boys. his words were, i want you to go taste the ice creams and make sure i'm your favorite one. so that's what i'm doing. i am dating. and it feels really nice. and i have had a really great time. i love that i am growing up. and i had a really great valentines day. a wonderful day of love. don't forget even if you seem alone... you never are. someone somewhere can't get you off of there mind, whether it be romantically, friendly or platonically. don't forget. because you really are loved.

i won't give up.

this is mine and bo's new song i just decided. it made me cry the first time i heard it. absolutely incredible.

guilty pleasures.

cosmo magazine.
junk food.
vampire diaries.
facebook stalking.

these are the deep dark things
i just can't live without

keep dancing like an angel scout.

my michael wrote me these words. and he has never even seen me dance. he believes in me. and that alone gives me strength to believe in my self.

talk about embarrassing.

oh boy bloggers. i have gone weeks without changing my font size because i couldn't figure the darn thing out anymore. than i found the right button to push for it to give me what i wanted. it was right in front of my face. oh boy. talk about embarrassing.

epiphany.

most of my blog posts lately have been about my lovely missionary. and i think that may be because he is always on my mind. he has been gone for 5 months and a couple weeks. and no i do not have an exact count down (i am not a crazy person). we have been together for 1 year and 7 months. and let me tell you. though it is hard to have him gone. and have to be alone for awhile. i consider myself so blessed.

i got straight a's this semester. which i guarentee would not have happened if he were with me.

i have gotten to know his family on a level that is completely wonderful. his sister is one of my bestest best friends and i really feel like i am one of the bybee's. and i wouldn't have really gotten to know them on this level if he were here.

i wouldn't be as patient as i am becoming if he were here. it takes alot of work to have him be away from me, but i know that because he is out serving the lord and i am waiting, i will be a more patient and loving mother one day.

if he weren't gone i would probably be married to him by now. and though i love him with all of my heart, i am not ready to be married yet. i have a lot of growing up to do before i will be. and maybe i will be ready in two year maybe in 10. but having this time to be independent is really helping me out.

if he weren't gone i wouldn't get to recieve his letters (right now once a month). i have always been old fashioned and i love that though he is gone i can read his letters and feel his love not only for me, but for his lord and the people of his mission. he is really becoming the man i want to have forever.



i had this epiphany just now. it is hard to have him away, but i am being blessed because he is. i worry, i pray, and i can't get him off my mind. this is a love i wouldn't trade for anything in the world.

i know we can make it work.